“And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your hearts. Verily in that are signs for those who reflect.”
Congratulations on making this serious commitment!
Click here to view the Religious Director’s Marriage Policy.
All requests to perform nikahs (marriage contracts) must be submitted through the below form. There will be no exceptions. Walk-ins are not accepted, and nikah requests within 36 hours will almost certainly be impossible to fulfill. If date, time and accommodations are not flexible, we recommend applying at least a month in advance.
Please note that submitting this form does not guarantee the request will be approved nor that your chosen date and time are accepted. Most common reasons for denial of service are non-Islamic faith, refusal to involve the wali, or refusal to obtain public marriage license.
Furthermore, we remind our patrons of our general attire requirements for members and guests (see here). We therefore require that any nikah ceremony where the bride or guests may not be dressed appropriately for the prayer hall to choose an off-site location (e.g. home, restaurant banquet hall, hotel, etc.) for the imam to meet you there.
Someone from administration will be in touch with you regarding the status of your request inshaAllah.
Finally, we wish to acknowledge for our community that yes, the ICP has performed some matchmaking services in the past. Alhamdulillah we had a matchmaking committee. We took applications. We protected peoples' contact and identifying information. We allowed people to send messages of interest. We developed and deployed our own app on the Google Play Store! We held a variety of events, each one different from the last, while always learning from past mistakes.
However, these efforts required a great deal of "back end" work on our side, and we did not see results and there was mixed reaction from the community. Many of those who begged us to hold events would decide not to attend at the last minute. Many of our applicants would also not respond to our messages. We finally decided to end our matchmaking events and activities and instead focus on education.
But not without pointing our community to alternatives!
As religious director, I have performed over 70 weddings through the Islamic Center of Pittsburgh in my 5 years of employment. For every single one, I ask the couple, how did you two meet and agree to marry? What I have learned is the following:
1. About one third of couples meet through family or friends. And so I encourage families to reach out and speak to other families. Create opportunities for your bachelors to get a glimpse of each other, interact with each other, and see if there is any possibility to take things a step further, without making it awkward. As for friends, young Muslims can together arrange networking events or activities, where things are separated, but where bachelors have the opportunity to know about each other. After that, it is only a matter of asking mutual friends, a brother or sister of the intended party, is your sibling or friend there looking to marry? Can you pass my info to them or ask them if they would be willing to have a chaperoned sit down?
2. About one third of couples meet through shared activities, like school, work, activity, or volunteering. Likewise, in these circumstances, if one does not or cannot approach the intended party directly, going "round about" in approaching them and gauging interest and willingness to consider possibilities. Whatever your highest value is, look for your future partner there. If you value faith and service more than anything, volunteer and look for your future partner there. If your uncompromisable is health and fitness, then look for a modest Muslim of good character at the gym. Look to where a person of value would be.
3. About a third of couples meet through matrimonial apps, like Muzz Match or Salaam (formerly Minder). In such apps, the intentions of the party are good by default. And so a lot of awkwardness is removed. It is only a matter of preliminary communications before arranging chaperoned video chats, public meets, and family introductions.
In all cases, perform istikhaarah. Ask Allah to protect you from temptations and ask Allah to guide you to a partner with whom you will both be pleased with each other and help each other towards all good of this world and the Hereafter. May Allah guide all our chaste-seeking to what is best!